In the beginning

I hate to admit my weight to anyone, but I have decided that in order to lose this weight I have to be true to myself and the world. Maybe this way, I will be motivated enough to get down to where I want to be, which at this time, I don't know where that is as I am taking baby steps.

It all began at the beginning of 2005. I had been trying to lose weight up to that point, but had pretty much been unsuccessful. I found myself in Florida, 3,000 miles from family and friends and at my highest weight ever, 310. I always kidded myself that my height hid my weight, but at that weight, everyone knows you are fat. By September 2005, I lost 30 lbs with just listening to what my body wanted to eat and when. I maintained that weight, for the most part, for 3 years.

Along comes August 2008. I ended up having a nervous breakdown, being hospitalized and being diagnosed with bi-polar. This started yet another weight loss attempt. The medicine I was given has been shown to cause weight gain and I pictured myself back up at 310 in no time, so I began journaling and watching my calories. This got me down to 265, which I had seen for about 5 seconds right after the birth of my daughter in 2000.

Unfortunately, the holidays came and a bout of depression, so I have put on some weight. I am not sure how much, but I know it is a few. My plan is to go back to journaling and watching my calories again on Monday, January 5th, at which time I will also face the dreaded scale again.

This time I also plan on incorporating exercise into my plan, which I haven't really done in the past. We got a Wii Fit for XMas and Gene bought a game for it developed by Jillian from the Biggest Loser. I am a bit afraid of trying it, but I know that I need to do it as I am tired of being this size.

I invite you to join me in my journey as I can use as many cheerleaders as possible. I know it will be a long journey, but as I have heard over and over, it didn't come on over night, so I can't expect it to come off over night either.